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Trust Builds with Consistency

By Joey Havens

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Build trust concept

“CeCe, we said we would be in the car leaving at 11:30 and you set the time yourself.  It’s 11:50, I’ve been ready since 11:15 and we are going to be late. Again.”

I have grown to trust that CeCe is going to be late most of the time.  I have also learned not to hang out around her when she is late. Stay out of sight. 

Yet, at some point, a reminder is needed as she can forget that she is late and start another project. No joke. Love her, but trust me, she does not see time as relevant as I do. So naturally, I have adjusted my view. Ha!

The problem with this trust is that I simply have confidence she will be late. So we can be trusted as team members and leaders and it be for the wrong things.

When someone is late for meetings over 50% of the time and they say I’m sorry every time, how do we feel about that apology?  Do we trust that they are being sincere?  Of course not.  

Our lesson is to work on being trustworthy while avoiding being trusted for the wrong things.  I always remind myself, you can be trustworthy, but you can’t earn someone’s trust. Only they can give you their trust, just like love, and they have to be vulnerable to do it.

That’s why trust is so valuable and leads to high-performing teams

We are entering 2023 with a huge trust gap in media, politics, government and organizations. Teams that build trust with each other first and then with their clients/customers will be distinctive and embarrassingly successful.

CeCe, I’m in the car whenever you decide you are ready to leave…

Coming in 2023, my new book Leading with Significance breaks through the limiting barriers of common culture theory and demonstrates, with great transparency, the real human emotions that elevate a culture to one that is genuine, enduring and magnetic. Sign up today for updates at